I never watched Gilmore Girls. It just wasn’t my type of thing. I like my drama to have more of a sci-fi twist (Buffy, Lost) or at least allow me not to think (Law and Order, Numb3rs). But it always looked cute and funny, in a Juno-overwritten-dialogue-nobody-says-in-real-life type of way. A lot of the charm was credited to the show’s creator and head writer (for most of the series) Amy Sherman-Palladino, who also is behind the new Fox series The Return of Jezebel James.

Having just watched suffered through JJ, I have to wonder how this could come from the same person who did a beloved show like Gilmore Girls. The characters are all so shrill and deadpan that it felt like a middle school production of Death of a Salesman.

With fewer laughs.

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• Another pretty young teacher got caught having sex with a student. Is she too pretty for jail too?
• Pinellas Bayway Tolls will be going up to $3.75 starting July 1st. What a great way to keep people away from this beautiful beach and park!
• Florida is having a budget crisis. So I’m so glad the legislature is taking time to outlaw baggy pants, create backdoor plans to outlaw abortion, and teach creationism in schools. In a time of high unemployment, a housing crisis, and the start of a recession it is good to know that you have your priorities straight.
• Hillsborough County Code Enforcement says that “Airstream Ranch” a kitchy display of half buried RV’s near Dover, needs to be removed. Florida is supposed to be tourist traps and roadside attractions. “Airstream Ranch” had that old-school Florida camp value going for it.

When I was a child I remember being fascinated by the khaki clad people that crowded the sidewalks down Ft. Harrison. “The Scientologists,” I’d hear them called in hushed whispers, while people carped about them taking over the town.

Honestly, as a kid, I thought Scientologists were the people who studied earthquakes.

Of course now I’m older and know better. They are people who believe that an evil alien named Xenu sent a bunch of souls to Earth and then put them in a Volcano. So, if you have physical or mental problems they are caused by the dead alien souls that are inhabiting your body.

No, really, that’s what they believe.

There’s nothing wrong with believing crazy shit. I believe that I’ve lived millions of past lives, mostly as an animal or insect. Some people believe that God knocked up a virgin. Some think that eating pork is a sin.

It’s isn’t the fact the believe something is crazy that makes the Scientologists dnagerous. It’s that they don’t tell people about the crazy stuff until they have already investing hundreds of thousands of dollars into “auditing”, a process that is nothing more than brainwashing and places people in highly suggestible states.

Real religions don’t hide their crazy shit until you’re too far in to turn back. We tell you the crazy stuff up front. Heck, we are proud of our crazy stuff because it is what we really and truly believe!

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I love Dan Savage, but I don’t always agree with him. That’s the case in his take on the Spitzer situation (or more exactly- his take on Dr. Laura’s take on the Spitzer situation) in a post titled “But What if Elliot Spitzer Wanted to Shit in his Wife’s Mouth”

Dan’s point is that some sexual needs are so kinky that it could be considered more loving to have them met by a hooker than to burden the wife with them.

And while I see his point, I don’t really agree. Because, in the real world, guys don’t suddenly wake up with a fetish. He wasn’t into vanilla sex when he got married and then, 20 years later, decides he needs to be dressed up like a little girl and pegged by a lady with a strap-on. No, he had that fantasy all along, but kept on trying to ignore it in an attempt to fit into the ideal of what people are supposed to find sexy.

If you want to shit in your wife’s mouth, then marry a chick who is into scat play. If there are no women who are into scat play then at least marry one who understands your needs and doesn’t mind if you get them met somewhere else.

Yes, these women do exist. We’re the ones who are told “you’re not the type of girl you marry.”

This is going to be a quick look at what last night’s Lost episode (Ji-Yeon) answered and what new questions it raised.

So, if it’s still on the TiVo DON’T READ ON!

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I’m still playing around with the perfect format. I’m not going to do price anymore, but by date. Also, I’ll be writing shorter descriptions and featuring more events. Like it? hate it? leave a comment!

Friday March 14, 2008

Downtown Live After Five

FREE! 5pm-8pm. Located between Tyler and Fortune Street in Downtown Tampa. Blockparty featuring $4 drinks and art shows.

Sip for Life Wine Tasting Benefit for Moffitt Cancer Center

$100. 7pm-10pm at the Ybor City State Museum and Garden. Reservations needed: 813-248-300 (ext. 31).Wine tasting and Tapas benefit for Juvenile Sarcoma Research at Moffitt.

Corey Avenue Progressive Taste

$25. 6pm-9pm. Corey Avenue in St. Pete Beach. Fundraiser for the Corey Avenue Business Association featuring food tasting and tour. And while you’re down there, head over to the Beach Theater for the next event.

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Frank Tedesco (you may know him as the guy whose Buddhists teachings were banned from Pinellas County jails because jail, even as other religious classes continues) is looking for a native level Burmese speaker who can serve as a translator. This is a paying job! He needs someone ASAP, so send me your information and I can send it along to him.

28intampabay@gmail.com

Here we are on day three of hookergate, and the questions are all about why. I posted my own theory below, about it being related to the virgin/whore complex, but some well known people disagree.

No, they think it’s because the lovely Mrs. Spitzer wasn’t doing enough at home.

Dr. Laura was the first to bring up this twisted idea on the Today show, when she suggested that because the Gov wasn’t getting what he needed at home, he needed to get is somewhere else.

His wife just should have started charging him 1,000 dollar an hour and negotiate future price discounts with him. That would have fixed everything!

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I’ve never really liked Bubba’s radio show back when he was on 98 Rock. I’m just not into the shock jock thing. Honestly, I’m more of an NPR girl. But they’ve been doing their fundraiser this week, and I can’t put up with the guilt trip anymore. So, I tried out Bubba’s new show on The Bone.

It’s not bad. I like his progressive politics, his fearless defense of the first amendment, and his desire to go after people (even if it makes him unpopular). I also know that he’s really a good guy. I’ve been 2 degrees away from him in terms of friends we both have (after all, this is a small town at heart). He is, from all I’ve heard, the classic good guy when he’s not on the radio. And on air he serves the role of community pot stirrer, which really is important.

But the show grinds to a halt whenever he starts talking about MJ. The songs, the skits, the constant bashing- it is dull. Besides, Bubba’s already won the ratings war. There’s no reason to keep harping on it.

This morning, on the long drive down 19, I was faced with either listening to Bubba go through an extended MJ rant or listen to the NPR money begging.

I actually picked the begging.

So, Bubba Clem, do us a favor and stop it with the MJ stuff. Show a little bit of class. When you win the war you stop shooting at the enemy. Focus on taking down the people in power (like Rhonda Storms) instead of starting some lame radio host war.

I know I’m something of a rarity having been born, and still living, in Tampa Bay. But I love this place!

Which is why I fell in love with these vintage art prints from AllPosters.com.

Hitching to St. Pete, FloridaIt just perfectly captures those feelings of old Florida, when we were a dreamland of sunshine and vacations. We were Vegas before Vegas was Vegas.More great images after the cut!

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